Delayed

photo not mine

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This totally struck me. In 2019, I got my degree and took 3 months before I got my first job. My heart was fixed on pursuing my career in the company where I took my internship. But then I found out they were freeze hiring at that time. So after that, I wasn’t really sure what I wanted. It was so hard for me to decide what I wanted to do and where I wanted to go. Nonetheless, in the back of my mind, I knew I wanted to work in the office and be in the airline industry since that’s kind of the stigma when you finish a degree in Tourism Management; plus, when I was in college, I was never interested when we discuss about the hotels. But then this opportunity in the hotel industry came. Not only it wasn’t in the airline industry, it was also in the operations – a total opposite of what I knew I wanted. Now, don’t get me wrong for being too picky for someone in the entry level of her career. We are entitled to dream of what we want for ourselves.

After 4 months in the operations, I was asked if I wanted to apply for a position in the Sales&Marketing department. At first, I was hesitant because from the background I was given, the people I was supposed to be working with are hell of a skillful, experienced, and talented people. Not to mention, they are all excellent in people skills and then there’s me – the awkward, non-sociable person I am. Anyway, of course I got so intimidated even without meeting them yet, but I reminded myself of this quote that says ‘hardest battles are given to the strongest soldiers.’ It was a big step for me because in my current job at that time, I knew there wasn’t growth for me there. So I took a leap of faith; I applied for it and fortunately, I got the new position.

I loved my new job. I loved everything I was learning. Finally, I was beginning to see a future for myself. I was satisfied with what I was doing. Then, the pandemic boomed. My work got affected; I got laid off. I waited and still am waiting to go back. I feel like my personal and career growth got delayed. At the start of the year, I was so excited to experience every season at work – the challenges that comes with it, the celebrations, my improvements, my potentials getting unfolded. I was thrilled to envision a whole year of work experience.

I pictured my 2020 with at least 50,000PHP on my savings account before the year ends, helping my sisters with our financial needs at home, buying things I like, going to places I want to see, treating myself out for a coffee, and slowly achieving all the other things I dream about. But I cannot control the things that happened this year. I have to accept this setback.

I may not have achieved everything I thought I would this year, at least I got the time to pause and see life differently. I have always wanted more; I don’t think that’s a bad thing, though. But now, I appreciate the little things the most.

I may have got delayed for now, but that doesn’t mean I will stop.

Back to Writing

Hello, I’m back!

I made my site private and took a break from writing for four (shitty) months. I thought refraining from writing would help me ignore some feelings I try to shake off in the back of head, but as I ponder now what those four months without my blogsite was like, I was pathetic. There were people I forgave even if they don’t deserve it. There were people I swallow my pride for, but don’t even appreciate the things I do for them. There were people who took away what I worked for for four years. There were people who tried to put me down in my shining moment. There were people who neglected me when I needed their encouragement.

And just yesterday, my efforts for the past days were wasted because I was preparing for a job interview in a hotel; worst happened, I wasn’t interviewed even though I was endorsed and scheduled. I don’t want to dig into details of my story anymore deeper. But yeah, the fuck???

Nothing much about me has changed in the course of four months that I was away except from having my degree. Yes, I graduated in college just a month ago with honors. At least, there’s still something good I can write about.

Don’t know what else to say… Perhaps we could interact to one another since I missed being here? 🙂

IF ONLY’s Achievement

As you can notice, I am a poetry lover. I really love composing poems and expressing my feelings through it, especially when I am alone.

On August 17th, I saw this page from Facebook (named Heart Speaks) posted something like a submission of entries such as poems, quotes, and artworks that the admin will be posting on that page later on. Since my piece “If Only” is the most recent one I have that time, I gave it a try and submitted it. It took like 2 weeks before I got a response and a lot of entries were already posted that time as I kept watch to see if my entry is being shared.

Sunday, September 4th at exactly 4:10PM, the page’s admin messaged me that she had already posted my entry and thanked me for submitting it. So I checked it right away on her page and I was like 20min late of being informed that my words had already gone in public. In 20min time, it already got like 1K reactions and 100+ shares (that’s a lot for a first timer!!)

‘Till now, Wednesday, September 7th, I’m still keeping a watch on that post so I will know if there’s a continuous growth on the feedbacks of people on my poem. Surprisingly, there still is! As of 9:55AM, my composition already got 5K reactions and 2.1K shares!

Woah! I don’t wanna sound boastful. Really. But I just wanna share with you guys my achievement because this has been one of my most memorable! Super! Thank you, guys!

And to those who view/ed my If Only piece here on my blog site (and my other compositions), thank you! Thank you so much guys! You have no idea how much it means to me; especially when you know your piece touched someone straight to the heart. It feels so much like Lang Leav. Hehehe. Lots of thank you’s!!!

❤